|
By Ton Nu Dieu-Lien, Hollywood, Florida- 2006
Coming back from a trip where we were engaged in charity works, Mrs. Diep Yen Binh and I were sharing with each other the joy of new achievements for Eyes of Compassion. Yen-Binh has a house in the heart of the tourist center of Hollywood-Florida, at only 20 steps from the Atlantic Ocean. She took me there to rest, to swim in the sea, to listen to live music and to look at people dance and eat throughout the night on the beach.
On this occasion, I often went swimming early at dawn, with the first rays of sunshine. The wonderful world of the seaside is difficult to find in the frozen Canada, which is often covered by a blanket of white snow. On that day, a strange thing happened. As I was preparing to go into the water, I saw tens of thousands of little fish playing near the beach. They appeared to have been born from a same group of "parents", and around the same time, as they were all of the same size, the size of your index finger. There were tens of thousands of them, but they were of 2 colors only, apricot yellow and sky blue, and they were as transparent as glass. They were guided by a group of "Papa Fish and Mama Fish", as large as the palm of my hand, dark sky blue or black and white.
As they were playing, I did not want to "disturb" them and I just stood on the beach to observe them. But I waited a long time and I finally realized that they continued to play without the fear of humans. I stepped into the water, and as I was walking, I said to the fish:" I'm sorry, my little ones, I have to go swimming now so that I can go to work later. I'm running out of time." I parted the water and started to swim along the beach line. Surprisingly, the tens of thousands of baby fish followed me, as if they wanted to make a “fish bed” for me to lie on. At the beginning, I was amazed, but it quickly turned into joy and I lived mindfully in the happiness of the present moment. I thought that happiness would soon disappear when the school of fish would leave the area where I was swimming. However, it was amazing to see the little fish follow me with liveliness and happiness. Once in a while, the “mother, father and uncle” fish would jump into the air, making an arch, as if they wanted to contribute a dance show for all spectators.
It was a strange phenomenon that is difficult to describe with words. I was holding my breath, as if I did not want to see that magical moment to disappear. I asked the fish: “Who are you, where do you come from and where are you going? Why are you following me? Have we been friends in former lives? I feel such a boundless love for you, my children.”
For a fraction of a second, it just came to me that the tail of the devil-fish is poisonous and has caused the death of two swimmers in the ocean on the Florida coast. I asked myself whether these miniature fish could carry poison on their skin. In the same breath, I blamed myself: “These children came to me with such joy and warmth. How can I have any bad thoughts about them? It is really not nice of me.”
An immense happy feeling invaded me as I was lying on a bed of “glass fish,” but I did not forget to warn the fish: “My children, human beings are not all as nice as you are. Why don’t you fear humans instead of following them? You should not be following just anybody. It could be very dangerous, you know.” With the clear blue sky far above and the silvery ocean around me, cool and clear, the little fish appeared to leave the worrying to others, and they continued to swim along gracefully, seemingly confident that their Dads and Moms were always by their side, protecting them and insuring their safety.
I leaned against the buoy, my legs beating gently, and I glided with the waves, marveling joyfully at the sight of the little fish. I suddenly saw a school of apricot yellow fish swimming and hitting one another. The apricot yellow color is the same as the color of “little Lac”, my little she-dog in Toronto. I’m wandering whether anything bad happened to her. Why is there a whole flock of “little Lac”s appearing suddenly in the form of fish following me? Are they reincarnations of “little Lac” continuing to run around to find me? I returned to following my breath, to be aware of the silly thoughts that keep arising continuously in my mind, to just be mindful of these thoughts without being attracted and carried away by them, to not lose the wonderful minutes in the present moment.
I continued to talk to the fish in this way during the entire swim. When I came near the rose hotel, which was the landmark that I had to go back to work after my morning exercise, I said good-bye to the school of fish: “My children, I am leaving now. Do we see one another again tomorrow? The world is so vast, how do we meet again? Farewell.” With regret, I looked at the fish for a last time and swam back.
As I was swimming back to the sea side hotel, the water was very cool and clear, so clear that I could count every pebble, every white shell lying at the bottom of the sea. I looked with delight and I was savoring the coolness of the pebbles and the sea shells that were still sleeping when the sun was already high. Surprisingly, the pebbles and the sea shells disappeared because the school of fish turned around to follow me and become a bed that hid the bottom of the ocean. No pen can possibly describe my amazement and joy at that moment. Continuously, I was asking the fish questions about many things. However, the questions have always remained unanswered.
The fish followed me all the way to the shore. Another good-bye! I stopped swimming and stood in the water to say farewell: “Good bye my children. Can we see one another tomorrow?” My feet had become two pillars around which all “my children” had gathered. They piled up on one another, pushing one another to come nearer to my feet, without any of them touching me, all taking care to keep away by just an inch. Choked with tears, I said: “What do you want now? You don’t want to let me go? You want me to stay here forever? Let’s meet again tomorrow. I’ll be back tomorrow, my children.” I pulled myself away slowly, with the school of little fish following me around my feet. I stepped on the sand of the beach and walked directly to the hotel without turning my head around. I was afraid that if the little fish would call me back, I may just transform myself into a fish to follow them.
When I was in the hotel, the first thing I did was to call my home number in Toronto to ask for news about “Little Lac”. At the other end of the line, Xuan Nhi answered “Here she is, right at my feet,” and she put the telephone in front of Little Lac, asking the dog to produce a few barks. I was relieved that Little Lac was still there and I promised myself to be more loving to her when I get back.
The following morning, as I had promised, I came back to the beach. On that day the sea was rough, the waves were high, and nobody was in the water. Far away, leisure boats were nowhere to be seen. The sea is too heavy, perhaps the little fish did not have permission from their parents to swim around, and there was a curfew in this entire area of the ocean.
The following day, I went early to the beach again. The sea was calm, the sky was clear, and the giant sea gulls were out in large numbers to try to find a prey after a day without food. Not one single fish dared to come near the surface of the water. Looking at the sea gulls, I knew that the opportunity to meet my little fish would not occur again, and it was not by chance that it had come before. Many favorable karmic connections had to be present for us and all other species to see one another, to say words of love, to live with one another in joy and harmony.
Tôn Nu Dieu Liên
Hollywood, Florida – 2006
|
