Scholarship

Among the people waiting in the coffee shop, I saw a single-eyelidded, dark-skinned boy, with his head lowered, his shoulders slouched, and his hands hidden between his knees. He wore a white shirt that had turned yellowish, with black cloth-mould dots, and a thin, short-sleeved yellowish-green pullover. This pullover was a gymnastic uniform, but he was using it as a “sweater” for winter.  I was compelled by my feelings and experiences to come and sit right by his side. I asked him: “Where’s your sweater?” He replied, “I don’t feel cold."  He was Toan, 15 years old, the 10th-grade student of Que Son High School that people wanted me to meet. Later on, the image of this slim, weak boy hidding himself in a thin gym pullover against the prolonged cold of the Central area returned to my mind many times. Upon returning to Hue , I phoned and asked teacher Phuc and Toan’s class general supervisor to buy sweaters and blankets for Toan and his mother.
The fellow villagers, both sitting and standing around two big tables, were so anxious to help him that they shouted noisily: “Tell her, tell her and she will help! You fool! Why are you closed as a clam!” They scolded him, seeing that an opportunity had come but he did not utter a word! People felt so bad for him but they had no way to help him.  Meanwhile, he remained still with lowered head, tears sliding down from the corners of his eyes. He buried his face in his arms and could not say a word. I tried to console him to ease his feelings.  However, understanding that he could not speak, I suggested: “If you don’t want to tell me, then when I have arrived at Hue , you will write me a letter, won’t you?” He replied timidly: “Yes."
Toan’s father had left his mom, his older sister and him. Working so hard to bring up the two small children, his mother became exhausted and developed a serious disease. Her epilepsy and serious asthenia has kept her bedridden for many years now. Poverty also drove his sister to marriage at an early age.  She reasoned that her leaving home would save food for the family. She gave birth to twins, bringing more wants and difficulties to the farming couple.
Every day, Toan gets up at 4 a.m . He cleans his mother’s whole body, then cooks porridge for her, and feeds her, which takes him a long time to finish, because she can hardly swallow. After that, he goes to school. At noon , he returns home and again, cleans his mom, cooks porridge, and feeds her. In the afternoon, he does the house chores, looks for food so that he can prepare porridge for his mother again the next day. After dinner, he reviews his school lessons for the next day’s class. I asked him, “Why don’t you cook all the porridge once a day to save time?” Toan said, “Mom can only eat warm porridge." Later I realised that this is true: there is much love in his porridge.  Actually, he hardly has anything to prepare porridge for his mother – with the monthly allowance of only 63,000 VND (or US$ 4) given by the commune authority to families of severely ill patient(s) and 40,000 VND (or US$ 2.5) by his sister. Having no money to buy anything, he has to spend much time and effort to make warm and liquid food so that his mother can eat. I looked at him and asked, “Why don’t you lose heart, living such a miserable life?” Still with his head lowered, he answered: “Because Mom gave birth to me, Mom has brought me up." Such a simple reason has given him extraordinary power to rise above every challenge and hardship that life casts upon his family.
The coffee shop owner and fellow villagers revealed that, earlier on when his maternal grandmother, who also suffered from paralysis, was alive, he had to care for both his grandmother and mother with a similar regime, i.e with two different bowls of porridge, one spoon for his grandmother, another for his mom, and again and again. The villagers told that when a Sangxane storm relief mission came to give rice for poor households, he silently came to receive the rice and cycled back home. He lives such a silent life, in which he strives to rise above himself. His silent act of paying gratitude to his mother touches the hearts of his neighbours. He never complains nor asks for anything from anybody. I hope that EOCVN benefactors will give compassion to Toan, who is in such a plight.
I suggested to teacher Phuc that one day, when Toan’s mother passes away, if he needs help to finish his university studies, he should let me know because I am able to afford his studies. Upon hearing this, everybody was amazed and happy, especially teacher Phuc. With a bright smile on his face, the old teacher said, “It is such luck for Toan. We can’t say anything else if you can do so." I proposed this without hesitation, because beside me there are thousands of “Understanding” and “Loving” eyes and hands that have been going along with me over many years now in our work of turning patches of arid land into fertile ones.
After this night gathering of villagers and teachers, Mr. Dieu handed Toan a scholarship of 600,000 VND (or US$ 40). We will continue to provide more financial support to Toan and his mother. Every three months, money will be forwarded to him. He will receive assistance from different benefactors so that he can take the loving milk from many mothers everywhere.
2006 Winter
Dieu Lien
 

Toan appreciation letter to Eyes of Compassion

Que Thuan, 9 January 2007 .

Dear Ms,

Everybody has an unexpected moment. It comes and goes, both unexpectedly, but it leaves in the heart of everybody unforgettable memories and lingering emotions. To me, that evening was of this kind. Though it is over, I have not overcome my surprise. It has given me a faith, a tint of hope deep in my heart. I did not know what to say to express my appreciation for the depth of the tremendous “blessings” given to me. And, also because I was so overwhelmed when I met you that evening, I did not know how to open my heart. Therefore, today I am writing a few lines to you and hope that you will understand me through this letter.

First, for a thousand times I wish you good health, much good luck, and a smooth and happy life;  I hope that you will forever be a “Mommy” of all unhappy children like me. That evening you asked me what had helped me rise above my difficulties.  Ms, the thing is so simple and close to our heart. I will tell you now.

I was born crying like other children, but I seem to have been waited for by unhappiness, which rushed to fall over me when I was still too young to understand. Why did the father abandon his wife and son when the family fell into a bad plight? Why didn't he stay close to my mother and me? These questions had always been haunting my mind. Why is there such an irresponsible person on earth, do you know!? But there is not any pain that exists forever, is there? I seemed to have forgotten this, forgotten to live, to head for the future. But living in the immense love of my mother that filled this emptiness in my heart, I felt happy and confident again among my friends. But - nobody can predict this “but”, do you think? Pain once again struck down onto my little shoulders. My beloved mother developed a serious illness due to overwork. Sometimes I felt like I was already knocked down and had collapsed.  I just wanted to let myself be swept by fate to wherever it wanted to take me.

Too depressed and worn out amidst my family’s bad plight, I sometimes thought of dropping out of school. However, in this poor but industrious land of Quang Nam , everyone is keen to get a full and regular education no matter how hard it is and how poor they are. Therefore, the will to study makes me determined, being fully aware that this is only way for me to change my fate, turn my life onto a new page, and roll back the lingering, haunting poverty. I am right, don’t you think? At school, teachers and friends understand and sympathise with me, so there is always compassion around me. They have helped me in many ways, in both material and mental terms, fuelling me with energy and hope so that I can overcome all difficulties, hardship and harshness in my life. And it’s not just that. Besides me, there are many bright mirrors - so many people who are in a much more miserable plight, living much more unhappy lives, but do not yield to their bad fate. By all means, with their own strong resolve and faith, they have risen above challenges and gained enormous success. Compared to them, I feel “ashamed” of myself - I have not lived up to others’ expectations because I sometimes feel pessimistic and disheartened. Therefore, each time I know of and learn from a person rising above his/her bad fate, I feel even more eager and determined to progress on my path of studying to reach my dream, my ever-desired goal.

I hope that you will give me advice and reminders so as to improve my weaknesses and make me increasingly better. Finally, once again I wish you good heath, and I hope “everything goes as you desire." From the bottom of my heart, I do not know of anything to say other than “thank you” for the compassion, the heart that you give me.  And I promise to myself that I will continue to endeavour, to be determined to rise above this miserable plight so as to live up to the compassion given to me by so many people - and by you.

“son” of mother Dieu Lien

Nguyen Van Toan

With the money you gave me, I have:

-        repaired my bike to ride to school;

-        bought a coat

-        bought medicine for my mother

-        bought school equipment and food.

Teacher Phuc and my teacher-in-charge told me that you phoned and advised me to buy winter clothes and a blanket, so I have bought the coat; I had been given a blanket before the storm.

I would like to thank you so much for your compassion.

My other contact postal address:

Nguyen Van Toan, 10B grade, Que Son High School , Quang Nam

For you who gave wings to my dreams.

My friends told me that if they were to write about someone dear, they would write about their mothers. For me, I would think about the ones who have given wings for my dreams to fly since I was still a very young boy. Those are my teacher Phan thi Lien and my benefactress Nguyen thi Oanh

I still remember vividly my first day to school. On that first day, it seemed every young student was escorted by his mother. But me, it's my Grandma who brought me to the school gate, and while I was shyly standing there by myself, Miss Lien came, held my hand and led me to join in the ceremony to begin a new school year. Each of us received a notebook and a pencil as a gift for being in the first grade.

I rejoiced but I had no mother to show to. Every night, I opened the notebook, and I could still hear Miss Lien 's voice: "Beginning today, you are a student of the First Grade." I felt so proud of myself”.

The school year passed by under her guidance and encouragement. I was voted Best Student and I was going to 2nd Grade, however, I could never forget my class 1C, my dear one. On the last day of that class, Miss Lien told us that all of us would go to 2nd Grade, that she was happy for us, and then she recited the poem "Farewell to First Grade." When she recited the lines: "Do what I taught you, I will be on your side," I suddendly felt I did not want to move on to 2nd grade. It's funny, isn't it ?

During the break time on that day, every one of us tear a sheet from our notebook, wrote her a letter, and stuffed into her briefcase. At the time we parted, I saw that her eyes were red. I thought to myself, that's it, there will be no one to take care of me any more.

During the 2nd Grade, it was so hard for me to concentrate and take in the lessons. Then , one day, I received a letter form Miss Lien. She wrote: " I always follow your academic progess and I believe in you”. Everytime she passed by my class, she looked at me and smiled. I felt so happy. I wanted to call out to my Mom "Mom!", but my mother was so far far away, how could she hear me.

Suddenly one day, I learnt that Miss Lien had suggested for me to received the 400,000-dong scholarship by benefactress Nguyen thi Oanh. Miss Lien told me about Mrs Oanh's life and activities, how she saved and minimized her expenditure so that she could help kids in needs everywhere. She had the heart of a Saint, the soul of a Buddha, to help those kids, like me. She has helped them to have a dream and a mean to pass all the blockades to reach to the dreams of theirs.

I heartily listened to what Miss Lien said. I did not feel sad any more even though I did not have a father, and I did not have a mother living near by, like my friends of  the same age. But I had Miss Lien, and I had my benefactress. They were the ones who gave wings for my dream to fly high.

The result of my academic effort was a pleasant one. For three consecutive years, I was voted excellent student. Holding the certificate in my hand, I wished I could meet my benefactress to show her my success.

I wrote regularly to Miss Lien, but I never sent them out. I didn't know why. I believed time was the most accurate meter to measure love. I was no longer a student in her class, my respect and my thankfullness to her however was still unchanged.

My dream might not be reached. I dare not reveal to anyone about my dream now, but I know to make it come true, I have to work on it right from this moment. Am I right?

I thank Miss Lien for arranging this writing event so that I can show my gratitude to her and my benefactress who have helped me during those years. I cannot see Miss Lien , and I cannot meet my benefactress, thus I would love to wish both of you excellent health and happiness, always.

Cao Van Tam